Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Alone is no fun!

Kids went to bed early today, since my elder daughter has to go to school tomorrow. Its too early in the night for me to sleep, and its been a while I blogged, so thought of writing something! Recently I spoke to my husband's uncle, who is a great writer and has done research in literature. He was suggesting that, I should write my thoughts without leading to any recipe, at least now and then, for a change and which would give a new dimension to my writing!! I felt so honoured and thrilled, that such a great writer suggested to me about writing, so here I am today, trying to put my thoughts without any recipes!!

I am not a person who likes to be alone, by myself! I love to be with the family always! I like to meet people, hear to their views, listen to them. But I cannot carry any conversation!! By nature I am silent, introvert and never express myself. I run out off words when it comes to a conversation!

I am a very good listener. I think a lot, I analyse a lot, always my mind is busy thinking or analysing of something or someone or some situation!

So as I said I hate to be alone, now that my husband has gone to India, I am alone with kids, managing the house. I am kind of used to this, since my husband often has business trips. And I have managed to be alone, dealing and facing all kinds of situations.

Some people call this as very independent, very efficient and that's how a person can learn,and grow when you are alone, to be independent and face life and situations!!

But I don't call this as efficiency or I don't consider that only from being alone and facing things, you learn and grow! My thoughts are totally opposite to this.

A person can grow, if he is in middle of the people! For example, you live with either with your parents or in-laws and with brothers and sisters, you meet and often come across with your extended family members, like uncles and aunts and friends............you learn from them.

Each person has their own perspective and views and ideas and you learn talking to them, seeing them, being with them! That's an experience, that also teaches you how to deal with life and situations.

Dealing alone the situations and life can only make you independent! But the more independent you become, the more you will move far away from people and become alone!

When there is no dependency, when you feel that you are efficient enough to deal with everything, then naturally you will be alone.

Just because you are dependent on people, does not mean that you are not efficient. Discussing your problems, sharing your issues, getting help, help may be any kind physical, emotional, does not mean that you are not efficient.

Taking people's help at the time of crisis itself is a way of dealing the situation in a efficient way! If you don't depend, the chances of making wrong decisions and handling situations not in a wise way, is always there, since there is no second thought or there is no input from the other person to tell you what you are doing is right or wrong.

And above all I don't think that a person can be efficient or perfect! If a man becomes totally perfect and efficient, then there will be no God! For me only God is perfect! We are human beings, who always makes mistakes, learn from past mistakes, grow.............!!

Its so dark and silent in the night here. I always used to wonder how can people live like this!!?? Back home, from early in the morning, it starts, the milk man, the newspaper boy, the housekeeping maid.............!! You would have interacted with these people, at least in a day if not with anyone else!!

The housekeeping maid comes early or late, you would have a discussion with her, demanding an explanation for her early or late coming and she would have a story behind it.................and you would hear to her story and either feel sorry for that or you would not have believed her story and yelled at her!!

Here!! No bell rings, nobody knocks on your door, you don't listen to any story nor you can do any gossiping with your neighbour, nor any sales person would come and convince or request or annoy or irritate you to buy and there you would have interacted with the sales person!! Nor some unexpected guests would ring the door bell!!!!!! No, not at all, here!!

Everybody has their own life and nobody is bothered to what you are doing. My brother, who lived in Los Angles used to say that, for many months you may not even know who is living your next door!!!!!!!!

Unlike, back home, oh! if some new family comes to live next door to you, you would not even care whats going on in your house, but would have gone to their house, to introduce yourself and offering them help and would have come back home, with a huge smile on your face, and give all the details of what you found!! Whether they are married and how many children they have, whether its boy or girl or they have in-laws or what furniture they have, whether the husband was handsome and wife was ugly or if wife was beautiful and husband looked like a monkey...................!!

May be we may have a nature of over curiosity, but still we share, we connect, we bond, we are there at the time of crisis, and we grow rich day by day,in terms of bond, relationships,sharing,caring, being there for each other, at the same time learning,growing,rectifying our mistakes, seeing people and listening to their experiences!

So my argument and my thought is a man can grow and learn if he mix with people, instead of living alone, being independent, which does not create any bond nor gives any experience other than a sense of superiority complex!!

Since I am alone and that too its night, may be my mind was thinking about these things and which my hands might have typed in............!

Well thanks for reading my views, now its late in the night I probably will go to bed, hoping that I might fall asleep, if my mind does not further wander about these thoughts...........!

I am planing to have some warm milk before I sleep, and I would suggest you to have some hot coffee, after reading my views! Shubratri(Goodnight) to the people on my part of the world and Suprabhata(Good morning)to the other part of the world, where I am imagining that people will be busy getting ready and rushing to office,school,colleges................! Take care!

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